In a powerful testament to the healing power of creativity, Midlands artist Ben Poultney, (with the alias of Benjibonz and founder of Draw My Town) is opening up about his battle with Depression and launching a partnership with Birmingham Mind, the very organisation he turned to during his darkest hours.
As Mental Health Awareness Week begins, Ben is transforming his pain into purpose by delivering therapeutic art workshops designed to offer others the same lifeline that saved him.
To the untrained, Ben’s depression made little sense. “I had an amazing family, good prospects, and the best friends anyone could ask for” he explains. “But for many years, I spent every second thinking that death today might not be such a bad idea.”
“It all started with daily panic attacks that I couldn’t explain, nor take control of. They took over my life and was having several a day. My brain was such an unpleasant place to live, that when I was on planes and trains I would be thinking things along the lines of – if this were to crash right now, that might actually be quite a good thing.”
After years of struggle, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and high dose Citalopram, Ben found his way back and art was not only his compass, but his one constant.
“The longer I leave it without creating any kind of art, the worse I am mentally. It is just as important for me as exercise, fresh air and a healthy diet is for most people.” Ben clairifies.
To mark this pivotal moment, Ben has unveiled ‘Sorrowing Young Man’ a modern interpretation of Vincent van Gogh’s 1890 painting ‘Sorrowing Old Man’ (also known as At Eternity’s Gate).
“Vincent painted this just months before he took his own life and you can feel his pain just looking at it,” Ben said. “It’s well known that Vincent suffered with his mental health, so I drew my modern version showing that these very same issues still persist now. My artwork tries to reflect the post-impressionist style that Van Gogh was known for during this era – coincidentally, a style of art that is in my opinion, excellent for releasing and showing emotion.”
Van Gogh’s original framed painting hangs on the wall behind the person in the foreground; the frame is hanging off-centre. “If you’ve ever suffered from depression or other mental health conditions, you’ll know that little things like this around the home simply become invisible. “Ben explains.
Ben’s illustration serves as a stark reminder that mental health struggles transcend time. They are as relevant and devastating in the 21st century as they were in Van Gogh’s era and way beyond.
Now, Ben is channeling his experience into action. His partnership with Birmingham MIND will bring free therapeutic art workshops to the community, creating safe spaces where creativity becomes a catalyst for healing.
“When I was young I used to draw pretty chaotic, often bloody and violent cartoon scenes. There’s no doubt this used to worry some of my family a little, but I think they soon realised that this was just me ‘releasing’ whatever energy, passion and pent-up frustrations that I had inside me (there was a lot of it).”
“I see now that if I didn’t have this outlet, my internalised ‘energy’ would have manifested itself in problematic ways. Many friends around me in my home-town ended up with addiction problems (if they were lucky), dealing, in jail, or are no longer with us and I’m sure that without a creative outlet I would have easily followed suit.” Ben admits.
“Art gave me an outlet, it gave me hope when everything felt hopeless. Through these workshops with Birmingham Mind, I want to show others that creativity isn’t just about making something beautiful, it’s about keeping your brain healthy, and finding light in the darkness. If my story can help just one person pick up a pencil, then it will have been worth it. Let’s doodle our way toward better mental health, together.”
For every print of ‘Sorrowing Young Man’ sold, 100% of the profit will go directly to Birmingham MIND, ensuring that Ben’s art continues to support mental health services for those who need them most.